what makes a person jumpy? periodically, I go through a phase where I jump out of my skin and scream with just the slightest startle.

last night, I opened the door to the laundry room, and there was my almost-brother brian, on the other side of the door, fixing to come into the kitchen to talk to me. I stumbled backwards and screamed bloody murder. jessica was in the living room and started laughing. I felt like an idiot.

just a few minutes ago, I was in the laundry room, doing what I usually do in there, and kris appeared in the dark kitchen doorway and said “mama…” well, that’s all it took. he laughed and apologized.

then there was the day last week, I was vacuuming in the living room and jess came in the front door. she went around the circle and came up behind me. since I had the noise maker on, I was more than a little surprised to see her.

all of this in itself is no big deal, really. maybe some people are jumpier than others. I don’t have this problem all the time, and over the years I’ve been told that jumpy people have something to hide. I don’t think that’s altogether true, because at this point, I’m an open book. there are times, though…but this isn’t one of them.

the part that bothers me, is the fear of becoming like my mother. she has always been easy to startle. she would frighten over silly little things, like those I just mentioned. but she would get angry at whoever startled her, no matter how innocent. she would holler and then turn the cold shoulder. it’s very frustrating to get in trouble for a crime as benign as walking into a room to get something. thankfully, she’s grown out of the anger part, she still scares easily.

and, in all honesty, stuart and I intentionally upset her one day. *just one?* it was after july 4th, and we still had some of those little popper things left. we hid around the corner in the hallway, and tossed them into the kitchen while she cooked supper. woo, buddy, but that was funny. I’m sorry, mama, but that still makes me chuckle. we only did that one time, though; she brought daddy into the game, and that was it.

alas, I don’t scream and holler and get upset, but I would like to be less skittish. any suggestions?

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