today rich and tony went to the cemetary to visit my beloved father-in-law. this was the first time tony had been there since the funeral, two years ago. I, myself have never been there, either. I just haven’t been able to work up the courage, although, the desire is strong. there are so many things I want to share with him. we all still miss him desperately, after all this time.

tony and his papa were very close. they lived under one roof for 6 of the 7 years of tony’s life that papa was with us. up until tony went to school, they ate lunch together every day. papa would come in from working on the house, and break out the pickles, peanuts, and some kind of meat and crackers. together, they would sit and talk, (even before tony spoke legibly, papa conversed with him) and just enjoy each other’s company.

even after tony started school, papa would come over and eat breakfast with them every weekday, and he always ate supper with us. he was the best person to cook for. he never disliked my meals, (even when he did, he hid it well) and he always encouraged me to be creative in my cooking. he had owned a bakery and a pizza parlor in his younger days, so he knew many things that I eagerly absorbed.

back to the cemetary…rich and tony both talked to papa, and cried some. rich said the wind blew a stray flower into their path, so tony picked it up and placed on it papa’s grave. when they drove away, tony waved to his papa, crying softly all the while. rich said watching it just about tore his heart out; he had trouble driving through his tears.

tony has always been really sensitive, so I have hesitated taking him to see papa. but, rich said he handled it like a trooper. maybe he’ll be my inspiration…